How does a girl go from being stood up to hit on to called a bitch in about one hour? Let me explain…
Last week I had been chatting with a guy on OkCupid and things were going well. There was small chitchat, talk about general interests, and we seemed to have some things in common. I should have been wary when he suggested we grab drinks that night but he was open to meeting the following evening instead. He asked for my number and we agreed on a time for drinks. I figured what the hell, couldn’t be any worse then the guy who turned out to be married. That was NOT cute but we only went on three dates; bullet dodged. Anyway, Potential Date was going to text me at some point on Friday to let me know where we were meeting.
Guys, you are lazy and very bad about timing. Even though I hadn’t heard from him I went home after work to get ready and didn’t really think too much of it. Testing girls on their willingness to go somewhere on the fly, being easy going, and not a “princess” is completely the opposite of awesome BTW. We like to look nice and there’s also the venue to factor in when picking an outfit. Please, gentlemen we would greatly appreciate it if you took that into consideration.
So, I’m in the midst of my getting ready process (running a little bit behind as usual) and still nothing. By this point it was becoming clear he had decided it wasn’t necessary to follow through on either the date or any type of communication. Seriously, all it takes is one lazy/lame text to get yourself out of it. “Hey, something’s come up and I can’t make it.” Is that really so difficult? It’s a text and come on, we’re not idiots. We can take a hint if you’d be kind enough to not just drop off the face of the Earth or get hit by a bus or come down with a sudden case of amnesia.
shirt : Alternative Apparel jeans : Joe’s Jeans shoes: Via Spiga wine: Blue Fin
After fresh hair, makeup, and a really cute outfit there was no way in hell I was staying in! Thankfully the lovely Sarah was up for a night out. Since I had kind of sprung this on her she still needed to get ready. The only reasonable solution was for me to grab us a bottle of wine from trusty old Trader Joe’s and head to her place while she was getting herself together. Of course it had to start raining and I had no umbrella. Not to be deterred, I threw my jacket over my head and hauled ass to the subway. Unfortunately it was not a smooth run. Some guy stopped me and I thought he must need directions. Why else would you stop someone in the rain who’s obviously in a bit of a rush to get somewhere? No such luck. Lame-o starts fumbling about how this might be awkward and he knows it’s raining but he had to say something. He noticed me in Trader Joe’s Wine Shop and had to follow me out in order to talk.
Uhhh…I’m not sure why you thought that was adorable to admit you followed me out of a store selling alcoholic beverages into the rain but NO. JUST NO. I know, I know, I’m cute but this was not the work of a genius. I was all like “Really, it’s raining and I have to be somewhere”. Lame-o was all like “No come on, what’s your name”. Not going to happen. Then he starts walking next to me down the sidewalk insisting I give him my name. I was insistent on remaining anonymous. Apparently, politely declining a creeper gets you called a BITCH. I’m sorry but just because I don’t give you the reaction you’re looking for that does not make me a BITCH. If I told you to fuck off then perhaps but even then that’s not the best way to prove you’re someone I should have given my name to. There were small children present so I decided not to curse when I yelled back at him that “OH REALLY, THAT’S HOW IT IS NOW??”
Ugghhh. With that lovely interaction complete I dashed to the subway. This went down all within an hour and the night was just beginning!
This is super easy to do! A quick cute hairdo in about 5 minutes, really! Bonus: Sarah’s canine baby, Kiki
Once I reached Sarah’s apt I caught her up on all my drama. While we drank the bottle of wine she got dressed, did her make up, and I did her hair. There is nothing a Dutch braid can’t fix! We took our adorable selves to one of our regular spots, had some drinks, and procured free drinks as well. Sarah found some guys she liked and I thought it best to play wing woman at this point. The friend of the friend apparently told Sarah that he was really into me and liked girls who play hard to get. Oh honey, that was not playing hard to get. That was playing not interested. I’m not sure what part of you guys aren’t my type was confusing or that I told your friend to 100% not pick me up off the actual ground or I would punch him. You can guess what happened.
Someone please explain to me why every single freaking guy always wants to literally pick me up. I AM NOT A DOLL. I will not go quietly into the night. I will, however, punch the shit out of you.
Outtakes! I have no idea how to pose..
Lesson to be learned? Never waste a good outfit; you have no idea where the night might take you. What started out as a shitty evening actually turned out to be pretty fun, even if I had to defend the right to walk on my own two feet. I’M A MODERN WOMAN DAMNIT!
Erica with a C 