Kill Refurb Marry: Epcot Pre-Shows

Once again Kill Refurb Marry has snuck up on me!  This month’s topic as chosen by the lovely ladies from This Happy Place and Mouse on the Mind is Epcot Pre-Shows.  Should I base this decision on music? Gimmicks? Or just something that tugs at my heartstrings?  This topic is a lot tougher then I realized; I honestly had a ton of trouble coming up with my choices.  So what did I choose? Read on to find out…

Kill:   Journey into Imagination…With Figment

I wouldn’t look so happy if I were you Dreamfinder.. (photo: disneydreaming.com)

I don’t know if you’d really consider the queue or Dr. Nigel Channings’ unfortunate introductory speech to be a pre-show.  Thankfully for me this is my blog and I CAN DO WHAT I WANT.  This might really be an act of vengeance on behalf of the Dreamfinder but I want this whole thing blown to bits.  There’s really no rhyme or reason to my choice.  I just don’t frequent enough Circle-Vision shows to justify outright murder.   Call it petty but I stand by my decision.  Sorry Nigel, old chap, but you can take your “degree” and smell a skunk.

Refurb:  Universe of Energy (Ellen’s Energy Adventure)

What is 1995? (photo: everythingmouse.com)

Oh Ellen, I do find you entertaining.  Sure the jokes are a bit on the corny side and the film itself is wildly outdated but it’s cute.  Who doesn’t love Jeopardy?? I have a sinking suspicion being a contestant on an energy themed episode would be a nightmare for just about anyone.  I only wish I had Bill Nye the Science Guy to guide me on a personal tour of Land of the Lost and teach me about the origins of fossil fuel.  While it’s all very sweet, this pre-show could use a Big Bang sized update.  Most of the references probably don’t even register into the collective consciousness of the younger crowd.  I will spare you a T-Rex like rant on the wardrobe, hair, and makeup choices going on.  I think Ellen and Bill Nye would still make a great team (and be relevant).  Disney could certainly afford to cough up some cash and make it happen.  I’ll take “Modern Wardrobe Choices” for $200 Alex!

Marry:  Illuminations: Reflections of Earth

Oooh pretty lights… (photo: disneyparksinfo.com)

Who does not get chills as Winnie the Pooh/Darkwing Duck (or Jim Cummings if you want to be all correct about it) starts his narration with “Good Evening.”  You must not have feelings or a beating heart.  The music starting to swell, the torches, dreams are on their way.  Let’s not forget the appearance of THE INFERNO BARGE! Fire good!  I can’t think of a better way to end a day at Epcot.  All it takes is that one moment and happiness is eminent.  This is a pre-show that holds it’s own and really sets the mood.  Illuminations, let’s you and me make some magical pyro babies.  I’ll even let the Earth Globe watch if that seals the deal.

Perhaps you strongly disagree with my definition of a pre-show but these were my picks.  What pre-shows would you choose?  Don’t forget to check out everyone else’s options.

Halloween Part 2: Not a Rock-God

Now that you are up to speed on how my Halloween costume came together we’re going to get to the real story.  Also, I’ve since realized that I am extremely jaded when it comes to guys.  You’ll see…

The girls and I pre-gamed at my place in the East Village with vodka and soda concoctions and tequila shots.  Once we were all sufficiently buzzed we headed out to one of our favorite bars, which is within walking distance of my apt.  They have an awesome happy hr. that we still had redeemable drink cards to take advantage of.  On the walk over we were the recipients of several high fives on our costumes from a group of guys with English accents.  The night was off to a good start!  Anyway, it’s a small place with an “interesting” crowd which we quickly took stock of as we made our way to the bar.  Once drinks were ordered we snagged a table and waited for another friend to arrive.  DeJanea and I were pretty happy to both obtain a table and get served by our favorite bartender.  Said Friend makes his appearance and I realize he had shushed Sarah and me at another bar last summer.  Let’s say I was less then thrilled, however, I was willing to forgo grudges when he ordered a round of drinks and Brain Damage shots.  They sound insane but are so delicious.  As my wise friend DeJanea has said, “alcohol is a solution, not a problem.”

Hijinks and hilarity ensued with some mild flirting and swing dancing.  What? Yes.  A bunch of guys initiated conversation by going the costume compliment route.  They were ok but we guessed they were a little too young for us, harmless.  Guy Friend and DeJanea’s friend are ballroom dancers, which leads us to the swing dancing.  They’re pretty good and totally took over the floor! The bar plays a very eclectic mix of music and soon we were all on the floor dancing to our favorite 80’s and 90’s songs.  More drinking of passion fruit martinis and talking to different boys happens.  At some point Guy Friend leaves and the Blue Barracudas decide to grab pizza.  Sarah and I being the team we always are stay put and continue talking to more new guys.  They are definitely interesting as is expected at this place but we’re having fun.  I’m talking to Leather Jacket guy and during the course of our conversation he mentions he has a recording studio in his apt. Uh huh, sure you do buddy.  We get to the point in our little chat where we’re either leaving together or not.  Leather Jacket is all about showing me his recording studio and honestly I’m pretty curious.  Clearly there are other motives at play here but you don’t need me to spell that out for you.

Leather Jacket hails a cab and we are off to his place to see how truthful he’s being.  We arrive and get into the elevator, which opens up directly into his ginormous apt.  Holy shit, how much money does this guy have?  Not only does it open into his place but also there is a full on recording studio.  I’m talking instruments, microphones, recording equipment, and soundboard with all the dials, bells, and whistles.  Here’s where I’m a jerk.  I take a quick look around and see a kitty cat.  This cat is super friendly and I’m not really even that much of a cat person but I am all about petting this cat.   I have gotten over the shock of a recording studio and am playing with a cat.  Who does that?   I could care less about this recording studio, this cat is purring while I’m scratching under its chin. Then Leather Jacket decides he’s going to woo me by playing guitar.  Ok, sure, I’m game.  He pulls a guitar off the wall of guitars and I’m thinking this is going to get good.  Wrong.  This is not a romantic “acoustic guitar.”  This is a “hold-on let me plug it in electric guitar.”  He starts playing and the nice little kitty cat jumps 5 feet into the air before fleeing the scene.  At this point I’m sitting on an ugly leather couch not really sure what to do with myself.   This just got awkward.  Guys, electric guitars are not panty droppers in this situation.  I’m clearly checking my phone totally unimpressed and trying to think of what I’m going to say before I follow the cat’s lead and peace out.  I. Just. Can’t.  This situation has gone from fun to bizarre and somewhere in between the electric guitar rock-a-thon to Leather Jacket coming over to the couch to seduce me, his shirt comes off.  Now I’m just trying not to laugh in his face, which is a whole lot nicer then I’ve been in the past.  Then Eureka! I have figured out how to get myself out of this.  DeJanea has left some things at my apt and I absolutely have to make sure she gets them back right now.

I also forgot to mention Leather Jacket is licking my neck and has somewhat bad breath.  Not helping him in the least.  I get up and inform him that I gotta go.  He’s all like “What, now?” Oh yes, right now.  There might have been deuce’s thrown up as I wait for the elevator to open into his apt while he’s trying to give me puppy eyes.  Sorry Leather Jacket, that’s not going to make a strong case for me stay.  The elevator arrives and I walk back out into the night.  I feel like I have made it through the Temple and successfully put together the Shrine of the Silver Monkey.

And that is how I was unimpressed by a recording studio and a private concert.  What’s the weirdest thing a guy has done to impress you?

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• Halloween Part 1: Olmec is my Homeboy (ericawithac.wordpress.com)

Halloween Part 1: Olmec is my Homeboy

While I am well aware that Halloween has come and gone, I am just getting started here so deal with it.  Besides, Halloween is one of my favorite holidays…

I try to do something different costume wise every year.  I like to piece the looks together myself which really appeals to my Visuals/Styling background.  My more recent list includes a historically accurate Flapper (I even went so far as to research the makeup), a Yankee, and Ke$ha (complete with crazy eye makeup and drunkenness).  My friend Sarah was Jerrica and I was her rock star alter ego Jem from the truly outrageous Jem and the Holograms (also with eye makeup and wig), and a Circus Ringmaster. 

Sarah has long been my partner in crime especially when it comes to Halloween tomfoolery.  This year we had 2 other friends join us for the festivities, which led to my latest costume idea: competitors in Legends of the Hidden Temple!  We divided ourselves into teams while figuring out which colors would look the best on each individual girl and which teams would be most recognizable.  Sarah and I were the Green Monkeys and DeJanea and friend were the Blue Barracudas.  We were able to order our shirts off of www.mypartyshirt.com (we were also able to snag a discount by liking them on Facebook).  The rest of the costume was decided by one brainstorming session.  We went with black short-shorts from the Capezio store, as they were much more wallet friendly then other comparable styles.  Originally the thought was yellow shorts to go with each team’s animal graphic but alas yellow is a seasonal color (not to mention a little on the sheer side).  So black short-shorts it was.  This actually worked out for the best since I had the genius idea to use black socks as kneepads and elbow pads.  All we had to do was cut off the foot part and use the elastic to keep them in place or from slipping down on both elbows and knees.  Shoes were kept simple, conceptually appropriate for storming the Temple, and comfortable by going with lace up boots.  We decided to forgo the giant gold/yellow helmets because I think we can all agree that’s not sexy.  Hair and makeup was more of a personal decision.  For eyes, I went with smoked out browns to stay sort of neutral but still play up my favorite feature.  As for hair I tried some front pieces pinned back for our test drive and just kept it straight the second time around.  I have to say, I was really pleased with the outcome.  We looked pretty damn cute!

I’d say most of the guys that hit on us knew what we were dressed up as.  That ranks as a successful costume in my book.  We were also the only Legends of the Hidden Temple contestants out there.  I think Olmec would be proud and spare us the evil wrath of the Temple Guardians.

Now that you’ve read about how the ladies and I put together our fabulous costumes you’ll have to check back for part 2.  I’ll tell you how I ended the night being unimpressed by a recording studio and an electric guitar.